A Bittersweet Season by Jane Gross

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Synopsis

Just a few of the vitally important lessons in caring for your aging parent—and yourself—from Jane Gross in A Bittersweet Season

As painful as the role reversal between parent and child may be for you, assume it is worse for your mother or father, so take care not to demean or humiliate them.
Avoid hospitals and emergency rooms, as well as multiple relocations from home to assisted living facility to nursing home, since all can cause dramatic declines in physical and cognitive well-being among the aged.
Do not accept the canard that no decent child sends a parent to a nursing home. Good nursing home care, which supports the entire family, can be vastly superior to the pretty trappings but thin staffing of assisted living or the solitude of being at home, even with round-the-clock help.

Important Facts
Every state has its own laws, eligibility standards, and licensing requirements for financial, legal, residential, and other matters that affect the elderly, including qualification for Medicare. Assume anything you understand in the state where your parents once lived no longer applies if they move.
Many doctors will not accept new Medicare patients, nor are they legally required to do so, especially significant if a parent is moving a long distance to be near family in old age.
An adult child with power of attorney can use a parent’s money for legitimate expenses and thus hasten the spend-down to Medicaid eligibility. In other words, you are doing your parent no favor—assuming he or she is likely to exhaust personal financial resources—by paying rent, stocking the refrigerator, buying clothes, or taking him or her to the hairdresser or barber.



From the Hardcover edition.
 

About Jane Gross

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Jane Gross was a reporter for Sports Illustrated and Newsday before joining The New York Times in 1978. Her twenty-nine-year tenure there included national assignments as well as coverage of aging. In 2008, she launched a blog for the Times called The New Old Age, to which she still contributes. She has taught journalism at the University of California, Berkeley, and at Columbia University, and was the recipient of a John S. Knight Fellowship. She lives in Westchester County, New York.
 
Published April 26, 2011 by Knopf. 450 pages
Genres: Other, Health, Fitness & Dieting, Parenting & Relationships, Professional & Technical, Political & Social Sciences, Biographies & Memoirs. Non-fiction

Unrated Critic Reviews for A Bittersweet Season

Kirkus Reviews

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Gross offers advice for those already caring for their aging and dying parents and issues a wake-up call to those who think they are prepared should the time come.

Mar 15 2011 | Read Full Review of A Bittersweet Season

The New York Times

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Gross recognizes it’s time for her mother to undertake a “reverse migration,” a move back north to be near Gross and her brother.

May 27 2011 | Read Full Review of A Bittersweet Season

New York Journal of Books

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Gross conveys her “hard-earned list of tips that you won’t find in the growing collection of how-to books and websites.” Ms.

Apr 26 2011 | Read Full Review of A Bittersweet Season

Bookmarks Magazine

Assume anything you understand in the state where your parents once lived no longer applies if they move.
Many doctors will not accept new Medicare patients, nor are they legally required to do so, especially significant if a parent is moving a long distance to be near family in old age.<br...

May 22 2011 | Read Full Review of A Bittersweet Season

Story Circle Book Reviews

©Copyright to the review is held by the writer (review posting date appears on the review page).

Apr 05 2011 | Read Full Review of A Bittersweet Season

Knox News

In her book, "A Bittersweet Season: Caring for Our Aging Parents -and Ourselves," Gross, who went on to launch a blog called The New Old Age, recounts her own experiences in shepherding her mother through the intricacies and indignities of long-term care.

May 08 2011 | Read Full Review of A Bittersweet Season

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