Preface On a Sunday afternoon in October of 1989, my world changed beyond my wildest imagination. It seemed every effort I had made in my adult life did not work! the words kept going back and forth in my mind: "I don't love you! I never have loved you, and I never will love you!" This statement came from my third wife! She and my six-year-old son had left over a month before. My third marriage was over, and in my mind, I had failed! My mind raced from one memory to another. Thoughts of my life seemed to flash back and forth, from my memories as a child to my teenage years and then on to my adulthood. I asked myself a question, "When did this pattern of failure start?" Was it as a child? Maybe it was in my teens. Maybe this was the beginning of mid-life crises? Then it occurred to me that it was not the first time I let the things of this world get me down. Questions flashed in my mind: Could this be a pattern? Was I paranoid? Maybe this was just life. On that day, I found myself lying in the bed staring at the ceiling, for most of the day, asking God this question: what do you want me to do with my life? So began a spiritual journey of self examination. I began to re-examine my fears, my choices and most importantly, my personal relationship with God.