Cassandra French's Finishing School for Boys by Eric Garcia
A Novel

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Synopsis

Cassandra French is a twenty-nine-year-old business affairs lawyer for a movie studio in Los Angeles. She has a creepy, platitudinous mother who is under house arrest for telemarketing fraud; and two best friends: studio exec Claire, who's sleeping with her shrink, and Lexi, a blond man-magnet of a yoga instructor. Oh, and she also has three handsome young men chained to cots in her basement. They're enrolled in Cassandra French's Finishing School For Boys.

Cassie has spent years in the dating hell that is Los Angeles, finding man after man who doesn't quite match up to her exacting standards. When Owen, a promising young man she meets at a baseball game, becomes a glassy eyed drunk by the seventh inning, she decides that all he needs is a little push in the right direction; after he passes out in her car, she brings him home, locks him up downstairs, and commences a year and a half of lessons on color coordination, behavior on dates, and ocassionally, sex. Owen proves an able student and is followed by two other likely candidates.

Things start to get a little complicated when Jason Kelly, Hollywood's biggest heartthrob, tries to seduce Cassie into fudging a contract issue on one of his movies. That's no way to treat a lady -- and Cassie has just the cure.

With an endearingly amoral heroine, a pitch-perfect L.A. setting, and a cast of unforgettably warped characters, Cassandra French's Finishing School for Boys is a shockingly funny, original, dead on satire of the dating scene.

 

About Eric Garcia

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is the author of several novels, including Matchstick Men, which was made into a feature film directed by Ridley Scott and starring Nicolas Cage, and the Anonymous Rex series. A native of Miami, Florida, he now lives in Southern California with his wife, two daughters, and a dog.
 
Published June 1, 2004 by William Morrow. 304 pages
Genres: Humor & Entertainment, Literature & Fiction. Fiction

Unrated Critic Reviews for Cassandra French's Finishing School for Boys

Kirkus Reviews

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Bridget Jones with a chainsaw: don't be surprised if this is one of the more popular beach-reads of the summer.

Jun 01 2004 | Read Full Review of Cassandra French's Finishing ...

Kirkus Reviews

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Even though they’re cuffed and weak from all the morphine and low-protein foods, the guys—all buffoons who disappointed her in some fashion, including one who pulled a drunken grope during a blind date at a baseball game—appreciate what Cassandra’s doing for them.

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Publishers Weekly

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French's penchant for great one-liners is matched by Garcia's imaginative plotting and his dead-on satire of life in L.A., Hollywood and the movie industry.

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Entertainment Weekly

It's the fed-up single woman's ultimate fantasy: Take the misbehaving men you encounter in the dating world and submit them to training sessions till they can pick up the check, listen raptly while you talk about your day, and quote Pretty Woman as easily as The Godfather.

Jun 11 2004 | Read Full Review of Cassandra French's Finishing ...

USA Today

Such a morbidly hilarious and strangely affecting woman could spring only from the mind of the creator of the latex-clad dinosaur detectives in the Rex series (the Sci Fi Channel is developing a pilot based on 1999's Anonymous Rex) and of Roy, the obsessive-compulsive grifter-cum-father in 2002's...

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The Best Reviews

Nearing thirty, Hollywood studio attorney Cassandra French constantly grades herself on six courses: Personality, Looks, Physical health, Mental health, Career, and Relationships.

Jun 22 2004 | Read Full Review of Cassandra French's Finishing ...

Reader Rating for Cassandra French's Finishing School for Boys
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