Dorked by the Rings by Stephen Frank Vitale
(a diary of Middle-dirt)

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An over-the-top parody of The Lord of the Rings trilogy, where the main characters record, in a diary, their personal stories as they battle to destroy SourDong’s evil Ring. Some of the wacky companions include: Frydough and Bilballs Waggin, Hamwise Spamgee, GoneGolfin the Magical Gizzard, GimmeLick the Dwarf, and Airofcorny the Dangler from the North.

The hairy little pair of ankle biters, Bilballs Waggin and his nephew Frydough, wake from a riotous birthday party to learn their simple life in Middle-dirt has turned to schmutz. All because the evil spirit of SourDong has returned for his magic Ring, one powerful enough to scare the sauce off a pizza. The fate of the realm is then left to Frydough and The Dudeship of the Bling who, ever onward, leave chaos in their wake, bungling through preposterous plights, sinister skullduggery, and the mayhem of epic nutty battles, only to face, in the end, absurdities worse than death. Can these loony heroes survive where no one else would dare? Will the madness never end?

For anyone who loved J.R.R. Tolkien’s fantasy masterpiece and enjoys a raucous parody, the personal dairies of Dorked by the Rings will make the reader glad their purchase contributed to the author’s desperately needed frontal lobotomy.


About Stephen Frank Vitale

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He came to life one cold December day in a Bronx, New York hospital, or so he was told. It has been widely whispered that a barn hatching was more likely. Or perhaps a materialization from the pages of a novel by Mel Brooksenschlagger titled: A Childhood Goofing-off (for fifty years) explains his existence.He was educated, but none of his teachers are willing to go on record and admit it. Surprisingly, some of the nonsense he did absorb during the academic period of "The Great Suction" does still reside in his sponge. And he is confident that one day it can be squeezed out if absolutely necessary.He currently resides at The Dented Cranium Mental Massage Therapy Ward in Hoho, California where he hopes to graduate soon. His tenure there has allowed him to collect endless biographies of his fellow "students" which has produced the many true-story characters in his published scribblings.
Published November 7, 2013 by Stephen Frank Vitale. 180 pages
Genres: Humor & Entertainment, Literature & Fiction. Fiction

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