Fifty Shades of Schwarz by Ed Harris

No critic rating

Waiting for minimum critic reviews

See 1 Critic Review

A fairly amusing, sometimes erotic story of contemporary urban Jewish young womanhood.


Fifty Shades of Grey is hilariously sent-up by an exciting new indie author, Ed Harris, in Fifty Shades of Schwarz. Ana Steele, move over and make way for Maya Stein, a sexy 29-year old Brandeis graduate living in trendy Brooklyn and working in Manhattan for an Internet marketing firm. While Ana of that other series - which has sold a mere 65 million copies - may be a virgin who never owned a computer, Maya is a confident, experienced young woman with several notches on her belt and who spends most of her day surfing the web.

As the book opens, Maya is dating Jeremy Goldberg, a part-time waiter and yoga teacher who is pursuing an online graduate degree in education and trying to develop a screenplay. Maya is ambivalent about her feelings for Jeremy. She insists that they be allowed to date other people and refuses to change her Facebook status to “in a relationship.” A chance encounter on JDate leads Maya to Aaron Schwarz, a brooding, intense commercial real estate broker with unusual tastes in the bedroom as a result of a troubled upbringing. Meanwhile, Maya’s mom, Dottie Stein, is trying to fix Maya up with a single young rabbi, David Teitelbaum. And, more than ten years later, Maya still wonders wistfully if she should have gone to senior prom with Adam Goldman, who is about to graduate from Harvard Medical School. How might her life be different today as a doctor’s wife if she hadn’t turned him down because of his teenage acne?

Fifty Shades of Schwarz is laugh-out-loud funny, while also a moving story of trying to find love and romance in a modern, hookup culture. Readers will identify with Maya and the other richly drawn characters, and be entertained by a humorous and fast-paced story. Find out why Stanford grad and former contestant on the TV show The Bachelor, Britt Billmaier wrote:

I so enjoyed Fifty Shades of Schwarz! In particular, I love the situations you've created to allow the reader to get to know Maya. I'm incredibly impressed at your understanding of the female psyche. In my opinion, you've nailed it.

Fifty Shades of Schwarz was written by Seattle resident Ed Harris. His children, three in number and of assorted genders, skin colors and countries of origin, are united in a common belief that their father was born fully-formed as a grouchy adult. His long-suffering wife bears silent testimony to the saying that “behind every successful man is a surprised woman.” Harris was born in New York, and has lived in the US, Israel and the Netherlands. He is regarded by his friends and loved ones as a nudge, a Yiddish word that does not have a direct English language equivalent, and used to characterize someone who is particularly annoying.

The author’s literary favorites include SJ Perelman, Mark Twain and Michael Chabon. Ernest Hemingway once wrote of someone going broke “very slowly and then all of a sudden.” The author implores the reading public to buy Fifty Shades of Schwarz so he can avoid the same fate.

About Ed Harris

See more books from this Author
Ed Harris is an award-winning playwright and poet. His stage plays include "Mongrel Island" (Soho Theatre), "Never Ever After" (Chalkfoot Theatre Arts, shortlisted for the 2008 Meyer-Whitworth Award), "Total" (Brighton Festival Fringe) and "The Cow Play" (UK tour, Squaremoon/Farnham Maltings). For radio, Ed has written numerous critically acclaimed plays for BBC Radio 4 in recent years, and he won the 2011 Writers' Guild Award for his radio play "Troll".
Published May 1, 2013 by Fifty Tales Media. 283 pages
Genres: Humor & Entertainment, Literature & Fiction. Fiction
Add Critic Review

Critic reviews for Fifty Shades of Schwarz
All: 1 | Positive: 1 | Negative: 0


on Jun 10 2013

A fairly amusing, sometimes erotic story of contemporary urban Jewish young womanhood.

Read Full Review of Fifty Shades of Schwarz | See more reviews from Kirkus

Reader Rating for Fifty Shades of Schwarz

An aggregated and normalized score based on 9 user ratings from iDreamBooks & iTunes

Rate this book!

Add Review