How to Fail by Aaron Goldfarb
The Self-Hurt Guide

No critic rating

Waiting for minimum critic reviews

See Reader Rating


Now with over 100,000 copies sold, How to Fail is the cult book more and more people are joining the cult of every single day.

Let's be honest:  self-help guides SUCK.

How to Fail is the world's FIRST Self-Hurt Guide, the polar opposite of a self-help guide.

How to Fail follows the misadventures, misgivings, and massive mistakes of Stu Fish as he tries to find success in New York City.  This satirical novel and guide includes such hilarious chapters as:

Chapter One:  How to Fail to Write a Cohesive Introduction

Chapter Two:  How to Fail to Not Get Mistaken For a Bum
Footchapter Two:  How to Go Insane and Garner Voices in Your Head

Chapter Three:  How to Fail to Make Your Parents Proud of You
Footchapter Three:  How to Fail to Write Commercial Material

Chapter Four:  How to Fail to Do Something Productive All Day
Footchapter Four-A:  How to Develop an Addiction
Footchapter Four-B:  How to Masturbate at Work

Chapter Five:  How To Fail to Live in a Healthy Environment
Footchapter Five-A:  How to Locate and Find Yourself Paying Rent to a Slumlord
Footchapter Five-B:  How to Have Fucked-Up Neighbors

Chapter Six:  How to Fail in Love
Footchapter Six-A:  How to Get Usurped By Your Girlfriend's Ex
Footchapter Six-B:  How to Have a Sordid Past

Chapter Seven:  How to Fail All the Way to Rock Bottom

Chapter Eight:  How to Live on a Couch
Footchapter Eight:  How to Avoid Your Ex in a Small Town

Chapter Nine:  How to Fail to Extend Your Family Tree
Footchapter Nine:  How to Fail in Bed

Chapter Ten:  How to Get Laid on a Couch
Footchapter Ten:  How to Acquire the STD That's Right for You

Chapter Eleven:   How to Be Haunted by Demons
Footchapter Eleven-A:  How to Be Aimless and Uninspired
Footchapter Eleven-B:  How to Piss People Off, Alienate Yourself, and End Up Alone

Chapter Twelve:  How to Have a Negative Net and Self-Worth
Footchapter Twelve:  How to Network

Chapter Thirteen:  How to Fail to Be Normal
Footchapter Thirteen-A:  How to Be a Hypochondriac Without Health Care
Footchapter Thirteen-B:  How to Grow Apart From Your Friends

Chapter Fourteen:  How to Fail to Fail

Epilogue:  How to Write a Successful Book and Become Rich

There's not an aspect of life that How to Fail doesn't tackle and offer a terrific non-solution for!  All delivered in perfect single serving-size chapters for a modern A.D.D. culture more used to reading blog entries on their phones while riding the subway than in carefully reading a book.

There's other people out there just like you.  Stu Fish is one of them.

About Aaron Goldfarb

See more books from this Author
Published November 9, 2010 by Chateau Publishing House. 383 pages
Genres: Health, Fitness & Dieting, Self Help, Humor & Entertainment, Literature & Fiction. Non-fiction

Reader Rating for How to Fail

An aggregated and normalized score based on 80 user ratings from iDreamBooks & iTunes

Rate this book!

Add Review