Singled Out by Bella DePaulo Ph.D.
How Singles Are Stereotyped, Stigmatized, and Ignored, and Still Live Happily Ever After

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Synopsis

People who are single are changing the face of America. Did you know that:
 
* More than 40 percent of the nation's adults---over 87 million people---are divorced, widowed, or have always been single.
*  There are more households comprised of single people living alone than of married parents and their children.
* Americans now spend more of their adult years single than married. 
Many of today's single people have engaging jobs, homes that they own, and a network of friends. This is not the 1950s---singles can have sex without marrying, and they can raise smart, successful, and happy children. It should be a great time to be single. Yet too often single people are still asked to defend their single status by an onslaught of judgmental peers and fretful relatives.
 
Prominent people in politics, the popular press, and the intelligentsia have all taken turns peddling myths about marriage and singlehood. Marry, they promise, and you will live a long, happy, and healthy life, and you will never be lonely again.
 
Drawing from decades of scientific research and stacks of stories from the front lines of singlehood, Bella DePaulo debunks the myths of singledom---and shows that just about everything you've heard about the benefits of getting married and the perils of staying single are grossly exaggerated or just plain wrong. Although singles are singled out for unfair treatment by the workplace, the marketplace, and the federal tax structure, they are not simply victims of this singlism. Single people really are living happily ever after.
 
Filled with bracing bursts of truth and dazzling dashes of humor, Singled Out is a spirited and provocative read for the single, the married, and everyone in between.  You will never think about singlehood or marriage the same way again.
 
Singled Out debunks the Ten Myths of Singlehood, including:
 
Myth #1: The Wonder of Couples: Marrieds know best.
 
Myth #3: The Dark Aura of Singlehood: You are miserable and lonely and your life is tragic.
 
Myth #5: Attention, Single Women: Your work won't love you back and your eggs will dry up. Also, you don't get any and you're promiscuous.
 
Myth #6: Attention, Single Men: You are horny, slovenly, and irresponsible, and you are the scary criminals. Or you are sexy, fastidious, frivolous, and gay.
 
Myth #7: Attention, Single Parents: Your kids are doomed.
 
Myth #9: Poor Soul: You will grow old alone and you will die in a room by yourself where no one will find you for weeks.
 
Myth #10: Family Values: Let's give all of the perks, benefits, gifts, and cash to couples and call it family values.
 
"With elegant analysis, wonderfully detailed examples, and clear and witty prose, DePaulo lays out the many, often subtle denigrations and discriminations faced by single adults in the U.S.  She addresses, too, the resilience of single women and men in the face of such singlism.  A must-read for all single adults, their friends and families, as well as social scientists and policy advocates."
---E. Kay Trimberger, author of The New Single Woman
 
 
 

About Bella DePaulo Ph.D.

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BELLA DEPAULO, Ph.D., is a social psychologist who did her graduate work at Harvard. She is currently a visiting professor at the University of California at Santa Barbara. DePaulo is single and living happily ever after in Summerland, California.
 
Published October 30, 2007 by St. Martin's Press. 335 pages
Genres: Health, Fitness & Dieting, Self Help, Parenting & Relationships, Business & Economics, Travel, Political & Social Sciences. Non-fiction

Unrated Critic Reviews for Singled Out

https://www.psychologytoday.com

May they draw blood, and lots of it:• "Young women in America [are] portrayed as shallow, cat-fighting sex objects obsessed with their appearances and shopping"• "There has been a resurgence of retrograde dreck clogging our cultural arteries - ‘The Man Show,' Maxim magazine, ‘Girls Gone Wild,' an...

Oct 23 2009 | Read Full Review of Singled Out: How Singles Are ...

https://www.psychologytoday.com

Which would suggest that many of the people who are single are either wanting to remain single or don't put finding a partner as a high priority...perhaps we could call these two groups "single at heart" and "default singles"?.

Oct 13 2013 | Read Full Review of Singled Out: How Singles Are ...

https://www.psychologytoday.com

If we lived in a country where 10 people got married, forming 5 couples, and 1,000 people never married, you could say that that country had a 0% divorce rate, and you'd think that marriage was highly valued in that country.

May 31 2013 | Read Full Review of Singled Out: How Singles Are ...

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Caring for and helping people who are not in your household: 11 minutes for both single and married people (Married people spend more time helping people within their households, but since about 33 million people don’t have anyone else in their household—they live alone—that’s not a relevant comp...

Mar 20 2014 | Read Full Review of Singled Out: How Singles Are ...

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True experiments are impossible, since people can’t be randomly assigned to get married or stay single, but longitudinal studies, in which the same people are followed over time, are better than the studies comparing people at just one point in time.].

May 11 2014 | Read Full Review of Singled Out: How Singles Are ...

https://www.psychologytoday.com

Yet anyone who has made one of these uncelebrated and unsentimentalized, yet increasingly commonplace, choices – such as choosing to live single or to not have kids – knows that these choices can enrage people who don't even know you.

Apr 19 2015 | Read Full Review of Singled Out: How Singles Are ...

https://www.psychologytoday.com

And the health insurance benefit alone may explain some of the better health that researchers, especially in the U.S., find when comparing married women with singles Another way to look at the financial picture is to review some of the work on divorce and its consequences.

Apr 11 2010 | Read Full Review of Singled Out: How Singles Are ...

https://www.psychologytoday.com

For example, risk of cardiovascular disease is much higher (60%) in divorced women over 50 as compared with still married women.Bottom line: It's very clear that marriage is beneficial to men's health and that divorce (or being widowed) is bad for women's health but not so clear that marriage is ...

Apr 07 2010 | Read Full Review of Singled Out: How Singles Are ...

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Research done in the 1970s and cited recently by Elizabeth Gilbert in her bestseller claimed that married women were more depressed than single women or married men.

Mar 29 2010 | Read Full Review of Singled Out: How Singles Are ...

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